Bobby is currently the General Manager and Assistant Publisher at the Daily Statesman after serving his term as Managing Editor. He wears many hats in the office, including coordinator of all things online, but his real passion is sports.

Tiger by the Tail

Posted Tuesday, December 8, 2009, at 4:15 PM

Ok, ok, ok.....another celebrity that the public has put on a giant pedestal above all mortals has come crashing down with a tremendous thud. OMG! What do we as a society do now?

Get over it!

Now it's time for the humor that comes along with being, well, perfect and then getting caught with your hand in the cookie jar. As a dysfunctional society, I believe this to be part of the 'healing process'. NOT! But it does seem to be the way of our species to get a rush or high off of someone else's unfortunate situation.

Here comes that intimidating voice in bass that does all the movie trailers....

"In a world that desparately feels compelled to create the perfect hero....another one bites the dust!"

At first we thought Tiger was playing an extra hole but it turns out he may have been playing an entire course!

No less than ten women have come forward and claimed to have sexual encounters with The Tiger. At last check, seven of these claims were confirmed! Come again? Confirmed? Ok, what does that mean exactly? Are there pictures? Videos? Other people in the room? How do you confirm a sexual 'trickle through the rough'?

Alright, I, being of sound mind confess that I have had intimate affairs with Brittney Spears, Kaley Cuoco, and Sarah Palin. My buddy Corey Noles has confirmed this so it must be the gospel right? If I were making millions and miliions of green for being on the green then maybe someone looking for an easy payday would jump on the bandwagon and say, "Yes, I made his putter flutter!"

The National press is having a field day with this. So many angles, they don't know which way to swing. Tiger is addicted to sex. Hello? Aren't we or weren't we all at some point in our life addicted to sex? Tiger may have issues with prescription medications. None of my business! Tiger's beautiful wife beat the crap out of him. Sounds to me like maybe he deserved it! Someone pass her a Big Bertha! Tiger's mother-in-law has been rushed to the hospital due to stomach pain. Maybe she needs to burp or fart! Tiger won't talk to the police. So put the squeeze on the police department or better yet let's just talk about Tiger's sex addiction. That's much more interesting and a whole lot more fun to joke about!

Forbes estimated earlier this year that Woods was the first athlete to surpass $1 billion in career earnings, more than 80 percent of that coming from endorsements with companies such as Nike, Gillette, EA Sports, American Express, Gatorade and AT&T. Gatorade has stopped producing Tiger's drink. What will the others do?

One thing we do know for certain is that Tiger Wood's drama will be playing out for a while.

Comments

View 31 comments

Note: The nature of the Internet makes it impractical for our staff to review every comment. Please note that those who post comments on dexterstatesman.com may do so using a screen name, which may or may not reflect a website user's actual name. Readers should be careful not to assign comments to real people who may have names similar to screen names. Refrain from obscenity in your comments, and to keep discussions civil, don't say anything in a way your grandmother would be ashamed to read.

UGH!!! I hate that picture!

-- Posted by goat lady on Tue, Dec 8, 2009, at 7:36 PM
However, I DO like this blog, BobbyG!

The public loves it when the icons fall, don't they?

-- Posted by goat lady on Tue, Dec 8, 2009, at 7:41 PM
I agree, coco. But there's an element of the public who have a Jerry Springer mentality -- the more dirt, the better. I think Greer is onto something when he says that society gets a rush out of someone else's misfortune.

The temptation for someone like Tiger had to be enormous: Imagine all the women who wanted to live out a fantasy with him.

-- Posted by goat lady on Wed, Dec 9, 2009, at 7:18 AM
Great BLOG BG!

I agree with TeleCoco and wish the media didn't foam over these stories. Also agree with my old buddy, the GOAT, and feel the Jerry Springer crowd eats this stuff up! Bottom line, is once these regular people enter the public relm and make all that money, they sacrifice much of what we true regulars enjoy as far as privacy goes.

BTW, he changed his name. Stayed in the cat family though. He is now calling himself Cheetah!

-- Posted by shannonhoon on Wed, Dec 9, 2009, at 7:42 AM
Man, I bring out the worst in you boys!

-- Posted by shannonhoon on Wed, Dec 9, 2009, at 9:38 AM
Bobby better watch the fantasies concerning Sarah Palin, the tea-baggers and repubs will be after your hide or whatever.

-- Posted by Dexterite1 on Wed, Dec 9, 2009, at 4:19 PM
This is great...haven't laughed this hard in waaaaay too long.

I think the reason for the 'rush' you all spoke of this way...inverse of self-esteem...the less we think of ourselves the more pleasure we get from seeing others being brought down...kinda makes us feel less of a failure...I know, just so much psycho-babble. What bothers me about this and all stories like it, is the arrogance that some of our public figures have about themselves...ten foot tall and bullet-proof...don't think they will ever get caught...whoops, some of them got caught.

Living life in the public eye is all or nothin' whether that is right or not.

-- Posted by BarbaraNTexas on Wed, Dec 9, 2009, at 5:13 PM
Women lust after men with money, fame or power. Ghandi was a married famous dude who slept with naked young women as a test of his will power to control his desires. Tiger is a married famous jock with a lot of money and no will power to resist nubile young women. Nuff said.

-- Posted by FJGuy on Wed, Dec 9, 2009, at 8:25 PM
Oh, no! The fantasies are rolling on "nubile young women"...

Tiger, Tiger, burning bright

In the forests of the night;

What immortal hand or eye

Could frame thy fearful symmetry?

-- Posted by goat lady on Wed, Dec 9, 2009, at 9:52 PM
gl, have you had any of your 'lyrics' published?? Shame on us all,,, not.

-- Posted by Dexterite1 on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 6:55 AM
I just had to comment on this. While I do believe that Tiger and his family deserve their privacy as they deal with this situation (or situations as it seems), I also believe that the attention just goes with the territory. Regardless of whether that is right, Tiger is not a dumb individual. He knew well in advance that cameras follow him everywhere so he knew EXACTLY what would happen if he got caught. For that reason I don't feel sorry about the attention. If you plan to do something that gets you put in the public eye and placed on a pedestal, you are well aware of what goes with the territory.

On a second note, nearly every moment of Tiger's life is on camera in one form or another. How could he have possibly had 10+ affairs and it have never been caught on camera buy a photographer. We all know that if it had been it would have been smeared on everything in the world before dawn!

Just wanted to toss my thoughts out there.

-- Posted by CoreyN on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 7:06 AM
Would the name of the sex video be:

Tiger's Tales

Fist Pump

OR

Bogey my A**! ???????

-- Posted by shannonhoon on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 7:33 AM
Oh, guys, thanks for the chuckles again!!

BTW, FJGuy, not ALL women fall into that category...I took off my rose colored glasses a long time ago...adjusted my priorities and although the money part would be nice, it would depend on how the money was being used by him (ditto on the fame and power). There are other values I value much more than any of those things. With that said, I tend to agree with you that MANY women do look for those things in a man...just not me...but then I've never been accused of being normal..hehehe..

-- Posted by BarbaraNTexas on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 7:47 AM
Dexterite - can't take credit for those lyrics - It was William Blake. Just popped into my head!

Boy, Corey - that was a good point. How in the heck is Tiger gonna fit 10+ affairs into his schedule without more than one of them showing up on the radar??

The money wouldn't be the only attraction for a woman; there's also the appeal of being able to capture the attention of a man up on a pedestal.

Be careful, hoon....We'd hate to lose you again!

-- Posted by goat lady on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 8:41 AM
Here's my take on how he could fly under the radar and you have all been dancing around it...money...those who have it along with fame and power..have their ways of staying out of the spotlight...the reason he got caught in this case is his wife caught him in the act of texting one of the other women and she took the phone away from him. In my humble opinion..(yeah, yeah I know), what she did should be the definition of "the good wife"...NOT the one portrayed by the idiot female who stands by her husband no matter what a low-life sleeze he really is.

Yep, I got up on the wrong side of the bed AND I ate my Wheaties.

-- Posted by BarbaraNTexas on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 9:24 AM
GOAT...you still assume I did something to get kicked off last time or was suspended from the site. I chose my hiatus and GREER will confirm that if you need him to. I know the limits and just because the truth crosses your limits, does not mean I cross the Statesman limit. FREE SPEECH baby! Got to love it.

-- Posted by shannonhoon on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 10:24 AM
Well...this is most definitely entertaining. Have to admit...I haven't paid any attention to any of this mess. I simply read the blog because of who wrote it.

I agree that the rich and famous just have to deal with being in the spot light. That just goes with the territory. I also agree...he could have paid folks off to keep them quiet. Then again...Barbara stated that his wife caught him texting one of the women. What if the text was sent to him in error? What if he was simply going to respond...sorry, wrong number? Trust me! It happens! I received a very inappropriate text from an unknown source just this week. One of the first things to cross my mind was what in the world would my husband have done had he seen THAT?!

-- Posted by fun2teach on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 2:35 PM
I Thank you GREER! Did Bullock help clean your balls as well? Cleaning up golf clubs, shaft and all, along with all the old balls found throughout the summer is sad sad time at the HOON crib. Hopefully we will get some of that global warming weather in the next couple of months allowing us to get out and hit it around some.

-- Posted by shannonhoon on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 3:36 PM
Fun2teach...if I remember the story correctly, not only did she catch him texting the girlfriend redhanded, she took the phone away from him and read the text and the prior texts...these men should take a lesson from Willie, whose wife, after he came home drunk one too many times after being out with another woman...waited until he was sound asleep, then bound him up in the bed clothes and beat him with a baseball bat...or another woman who suspected her husband of cheating, borrowed her friend's car one evening, followed the husband from his work to a motel to meet the other woman. The wife explained the situation to the hotel manager, who granted her entry to the hotel room...the wife had waited until she was sure they were asleep before she entered the room..this is where it gets funny...she woke the woman up, told her to get the (blank) out of there and climbed into bed with her husband...who was very surprised when he woke up...

-- Posted by BarbaraNTexas on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 4:42 PM
Another angle of this is that TW is being described as a racist by Blacks because he isn't diverse enough in the women he chooses as playmates. He only seems to like nubile young fair-skinned women.

-- Posted by FJGuy on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 5:19 PM
Now FJ, why did you have to go and say something like that. Oh, wait a minute, Al 'the murderer' Sharpton already did.

-- Posted by BonScott on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 7:34 PM
Oh, Barbara...the second scenario is by far the best! Couldn't you just picture the look on the man's face when he woke up and saw his wife?! As for Tiger Woods' wife...if she had 100% proof then by all means she should have grabbed a club and started swinging!

-- Posted by fun2teach on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 7:45 PM
Interesting thinking f2t. Based on your suggestion, if TW's wife had succeeded in killing him for his dalliances rather than just injuring him, then she could have possibly been acquitted by a female dominated jury. Cleared of committing a crime, she would have been in line to collect his full estate, and not just some measly tens of millions from a divorce settlement!

-- Posted by FJGuy on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 7:56 PM
Tiger just held his first news conference and declared it wasn't ten fair haired young ladies, it was only 'fore'.

-- Posted by Dexterite1 on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 9:06 PM
Dexterite bringing some serious humor there! I like it.

Reports tonight say Woods is OUT of the hizouse and hiding out elsewhere. Man, this is playing out to look like the downfall, likely not all the way/but to some degree, of an icon.

I am calling Bullock cleaned GREER's clubs well, but wouldn't touch the balls.

-- Posted by shannonhoon on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 9:21 PM
Fun2teach...they are both True stories, and I agree, the look on his face would have been priceless. I had a similar experience one morning when I woke up and told my soon to be ex about the dream I had just had, where I caught him cheating on me, and that in the dream, I had killed the woman and framed him for the murder...it is the only time I ever saw fear on that man's face and he asked me, "You wouldn't REALLY do that, would you?" I laughed out loud and said, "Try me." I didn't know at the time that he was cheating on me with a woman I had introduced him to...

FJGuy, contrary to popular belief it isn't always about money.

-- Posted by BarbaraNTexas on Thu, Dec 10, 2009, at 10:28 PM
Tiger, Tiger, burning bright,

Who will be your love tonight?

Do we care about your score?

Ten or twenty? Maybe more !

-- Posted by wartz on Fri, Dec 11, 2009, at 1:43 AM
Oh, no! Our non-resident New Zealander is profaning the poetry of William Blake, while hoon takes shots at Greer's balls!! The Statesman site is going down the tubes!!!

That's what happens to ya, Greer, when you play around with Dead Rockers! No respect!

-- Posted by goat lady on Fri, Dec 11, 2009, at 7:38 AM
GREER is loaded with street cred and golf cred! If you have never seen him play, he is one of the few guys out on the linx with dirty balls and a stiff shaft, while somehow maintaining touch and feel around the hole. Tiger is NO match for GREER, at least when it comes to the street cred part!

-- Posted by shannonhoon on Fri, Dec 11, 2009, at 8:44 AM
NO DOUBT my man!

BTW: Is the report about Tigger being booted and hiding out true? Hard to keep up and still trying to decide if I even care. Very amazing to think of how his life and image have changed. Not since I climbed on our tour bus in New Orleans and OD'd on herion can I recall such a drastic freefall of a legend.

-- Posted by shannonhoon on Fri, Dec 11, 2009, at 9:30 AM
CoreyN, one of the women said in an interview that TW didn't make any effort to hide their dalliance. When they were in public at restaurants and nightspots people would take their picture together, etc.

-- Posted by FJGuy on Fri, Dec 11, 2009, at 4:19 PM

Respond to this blog

Posting a comment requires free registration:

If you already have an account, follow this link to login
Otherwise, follow this link to register